Catra

[heterochrocatic]

● CATRA
go away
[video | audio | text]

Comments

text;

[princesspower]

Dear Catra,

This is sort of a rewrite of a letter I never thought I'd get or want to send, but now we're here, so I guess I'm sending it.

You were my enemy and and for the longest time I thought that was it; that we always would be. Before that, I had hope that you'd see the light and realize that Etheria was a beautiful place that needed to be saved. But after everything, I finally realized that you weren't going to be coming around and that made me so incredibly sad, Catra.

I missed you and I always did.

I missed your smile and the way your eyes gleamed when you beat me in race during training. I missed laughing with you. I even missed your stupid snoring! I still do.

Those are the things I thought about when I thought about you, Catra, during the war. Because those were the good things and remembering all the bad things? That just hurt. I just wanted to remember the good about you.

I'm sorry things ended up the way they did. I'm sorry you got hurt. I'm sorry about everything. I still think I'd redo it the same way if we had to redo it all over again, though. I don't know what's going to happen next with us or what this place is going to mean. I don't know how this is going to effect us. But I guess we're stuck together and maybe I can start remembering good things about you again.

Love,

Adora

1/???

[heterochrocatic]

[ !!!! ]

[heterochrocatic]

[ LOVE???? ]

text;

[heterochrocatic]

WHAT DO YOU MEAN LOVE????????

text;

[princesspower]

What? I mean love!

[ This is not the reaction she expected. She didn't expect to get anything, honestly. ]

text;

[heterochrocatic]

you can't just write that you love me.

and that you miss all that stupid stuff about me

not after everything that happened!!!

what the ████ adora

text;

[princesspower]

Why not? It's true!

Re: text;

[heterochrocatic]

adora you're so STUPID i can't stand it

i missed you too, idiot

i missed you a LOT

you were the only person who cared about me!

[princesspower]

You kept trying to kill me and my friends!

And of course I cared about you, but you never acted like it after

after everything!

[heterochrocatic]

i LOVED YOU THE ENTIRE TIME you MORON

TEXT

[71lines]

Fair warning. You've got an angry girlfriend coming your way. Adora and I got into it a bit.

Re: TEXT

[heterochrocatic]

Got into it a bit??? What does that mean???

[71lines]

Ah, I may've been a bit stupid.

She came to make sure I was okay and ask what'd make me happy. I asked her what would make her happy. And she fed me a line about how making us happy would make her happy. So I called her on lying to me and hammered on her a little harder than I needed to, I guess. Tried to make her jealous. Worked too, I think, but she didn't get it.

I just-I wanted her to be honest with herself and realize that her happiness matters too. And I failed at that because she just-she's so stubborn.

[heterochrocatic]

[ Tenten gets a message indicating Catra is typing. It disappears after a moment. Reappears. It goes through that a couple times before finally there's a reply. ]

Yeah. She's a stubborn idiot, I could have told you that much. I asked her that before too, but I got the same stupid answer. She's focused on sacrificing herself for everyone else around her and I don't know how to stop that.

Trying to run into her head on is just going to get you knocked over. You have to come at it from a different angle. I think I've had a little success relating it to my own experiences but it's hard to tell.

Also gods I really don't want to be in the middle of this crap.

[71lines]

Sorry. I was just trying to help.

I didn't realize how dense she could be, but she kind of irritated me when she acted like she was okay with everything when she clearly wasn't.

I told her that what would make me happiest would be to date you, that I could make you as happy as she did, and she just deflected. Said that you'd be with me if you wanted to. That's about when I lost my temper and really started jumping down her throat, more than I should have.

I'll apologize to her when we've both had some time to cool down. I didn't mean to make trouble for you. I'm sorry.

And I know I can't make you as happy as she does. I was just trying to get some kind of reaction out of her. Try to get her to be a little selfish.

[heterochrocatic]

I tried to get her to be jealous before too. She's so... Ugh.

She needs to learn to care about herself. Like, what you said was stupid and probably hurt her. At the same time, I get it. I get wanting her to be honest about what she wants and not to just... Give people what she thinks will make them happiest.

You're both idiots.

[71lines]

Yeah, I am.

She got jealous when I mentioned that we hugged, though. Just for a second, but I could see it. I'm trained to spot things like that.

So, just so you know. You're important enough to her that she wants you to herself. She just can't say it.

voice;

[princesspower]

[ Ring, ring. Incoming call. ]

Re: voice;

[heterochrocatic]

Hey, Adora.

[princesspower]

I tried talking to Tenten and she just got weird.

[ Adora sounds upset. Angry. Tense. ]

[heterochrocatic]

Weird how?

[ Tenten already messaged her, of course. She wants to hear what Adora says though. ]

[princesspower]

I don't know! She started talking about how I'd lose you if I was dishonest and accused me of lying to you and to myself and that I was risking doing damage and it was just this total flip!

[ Adora pauses and there's a deep, deep breath. ]

I don't get her! I don't know why she'd say those things!

[heterochrocatic]

Because she sees you putting everyone else before you instead of letting yourself be even a little selfish.

[ A deep breath. ]

She was stupid to shove it in your face that way but she's worried about the things I worry about too. That you don't tell me how you really feel about stuff because you want to support me or because you think it'll make people happy. Even if makes you unhappy or hurts you or something.

[princesspower]

I don't want to be selfish, Catra!

[ Adora stares at her communicator, feeling even more confused now. Now Catra's getting in on this? ]

I don't need to be. [ Doesn't want to be. She can't be. She has to give until she's completely empty or she's nothing. ]

I'll always be honest with you Catra. You know that...

[Action - Very Belated X-Mas Gift]

[monkey_wrench]

[On Christmas, Catra will eventually find a gift in her room. Likely left on a desk or the couch. A decent-sized boombox/CD-player sits unwrapped, painted metallic red with black accents, and speakers that are black with red claw marks neatly painted on them. Next to it is a smaller wrapped gift that contains three CDs (of your choosing). And on top of the smaller package is a note that simply reads "For, Catra" in messy handwriting, with no indication of who it was from, though the handwriting is pretty distinct.]